Danger Will Robinson!

Do not EVER, I repeat NEVER, EVER – whether by accident or deliberate intent, allow Champage to come in direct contact with your genitalia. Well, unless you enjoy the idea of simulating the sensation of plucking the Sun from the center of our solar system and placing it directly onto your bodies most sensitive tissue – Or even the idea of giving it the feeling of drinking a gallon of Moonshine, rapidly… then by all means, have a go!

*Why in the hell would i just randomly say this? Ok, first, no type of “warning” ever originates from a random place, they all come from someone who has, ohhh, let’s say – thought it would be cute to pour champagne over them in the bath tub, to perhaps enjoy the tickly bubble sensation and were sent flying 6 feet vertically the instant said alcoholic “bubbles” launched an assault (to rival that of Hiroshima) on their girl parts. An assault that neither soap nor rapid slapping could sooth. I’m not naming any names or anything *whistle* but – You have been warned.

That is all.